Tuesday 8 June, 10am

It’s the last day before the parliamentary elections and after a seemingly endless series of radio debates, televisions debates, Twitter debates, Hyves debates and whatever else debates, I’m not going to watch the last televised election debate from the leaders of the political parties. I’m sick and tired of listening to testosterone-fuelled alpha males (this includes the female leaders) not letting each other finish one single sentence.

Tuesday 8 June, 1pm

I’m not going to watch the last debate.

How many obtuse one-liners can a human being take? ‘I’m going for gold’ (JP the almost ex-Premier). ‘How would you feel if there would be more mosques than churches in this country?’ (political terrorist Geert Wilders, when challenging Prime-Minister Balkenende’s Dutchness).

‘If you state that you want to do the same thing for the Netherlands as you did for Amsterdam, that isn’t a promise but rather a threat’ (the Freedom Party’s hydrogen peroxide ‘poster boy’ again, on Social-Democratic leader and former Amsterdam Mayor Job Cohen’s outlook on the future of the nation).

Tuesday 8 June, 5pm

I’m not going to watch the last debate.

I never ever want to hear Wilders accuse Cohen of ‘drinking tea’ again. It’s the professional Islamophobe’s favourite metaphor with regards to Cohen’s handling of hate-mongering imams – in Wilders’ view, Cohen would rather have a cup of tea with them than unleashing an iron fist against them.

Tuesday 8 June, 10pm

I watched the last debate.

Rita Verdonk of TON (Proud of Holland), Wilders’ vicious political cousin, wanted to know Marianne Thieme’s (Party for the Animals) position on birds that jeopardise air traffic. Wilders reminded Emile Roemer (Socialist Party) of his party’s Maoist past.

D66 leader Alexander Pechtold (Progressive Liberals) threw in some common themes on education. Femke Halsema (Green Left) said we should invest in education and a few other things. Pechtold accused outgoing Vice-Premier André Rouvoet (Christian Union) of being homophobic, euthanasiaphobic and abortionphobic.

Balkenende attacked the winner-to-be, Conservative Liberal Mark Rutte, accusing him of proposing anti-social measures. Cohen feared social division if Rutte would become prime-minister. Wilders: mass immigration, Islam, blah blah. Cohen, after a couple of weeks of canvassing, showed once more that he will probably never be the king of the one-liner.

All night long, all of the leaders sounded like needles that were stuck in the grooves of their own record. The only new sound was Verdonk’s interest in the birds around Schiphol.

Wednesday 9 June, 8am

I’m off to the polling booth to vote Green Left.

Read More:

Part one – The Post-Balkenende Post

Part two – Henk, Ingrid and Geert

Part three – Make-Or-Break Is Fake

Part four – Radioactive Politics

Part five – Fuck Drugs!